How To Get Your Ex Back - Getting Real With Yourself
Go to: Previous Article Next Article
Just the mention of the words pain, loss, rejection and failure conjure up vivid images of suffering and perhaps the most powerful of all human emotions, fear. Fear can drives us insane. We've all experienced failure in the past, but few of us have learned how to channel our failures into victories. We allow our emotions to take control, so rather than intellectually learn from our mistakes and grow, we find ourselves in the position of being a victim of circumstances that appear to be out of our control.
So, let's get to the heart of the matter, you've split with your partner, the one you believe to be the love of your life, your soul mate. You are heartbroken, lonely, sad and feel completely empty inside. Quite simply, the loss of your partner has brought you to your knees and you don't know what to do. Stop for a moment, there is hope. Regardless of your situation and the circumstances of your split, most relationships can be salvaged and rebuilt to be stronger and more fulfilling than before. It happens all the time! Keep in mind that most break-ups do not occur because the love that your shared is gone, but rather as a result of some event or series of events. But your actions after the split can cause irreversable damage to your love.
If you are fully committed to winning your ex back, then the process begins and ends with you. It's going to take a lot of work and a tremendous amount of discipline, but the reward of getting your ex back into your arms is the utlimate prize, right? Ask yourself, is your ex worth your effort?
Get control of yourself and cut off all communication with your ex, even if they contact you. Stop terrorizing your ex by calling, texting or emailing to get ur ex back, it usually doesn't work to your advantage. Do you like to have someone who is despondent and needy contacting you all the time? It brings you down with them, doesn't it? People want to be around others that make them feel good, so keep the drama to yourself and cut off the communication channels for now.
Get up and get moving. Sleeping, eating, drinking or indulging in any other self-sabotaging behavior isn't going to help the situation one bit. Accept that you've split for now. What you do from this point forward will weigh heavily on whether you can successfuly get your ex back. Also, re-engaging in life will not only help you begin to feel better, but it will also show your ex that you respect the decision to break-up and are getting yourself together. Exercising is a wonderful and natural way to release stress, join a gym, start walking, go out dancing with friends, just get moving!
Albert Einstein stated that the definition of insanity is "doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result". Is the act of repeating the final moments of your relationship, you know the break-up, over and over again a thousand times in your head, going to yield a different result? No! You have broken-up. The past is in the past, you cannot change it now. What you can change is the future, that's within your control. Take this time to take an honest, hard look at your relationship, and ask yourself, what happened, why did it happen and how can it be avoided in the future. Write down your answers, by writing down your answers your mind begins the process of resolving the problem. Only by looking at how we can improve ourselves, not our ex, can we begin to renew ourselves, learn and grow.
Stop playing games. Don't waste your energy on crazy schemes to try and get your ex back. Jealousy, manipulation, threats, guilt trips, begging, stalking or spying are a complete waste of time and will only make you feel more anger, bitterness and hurt in the end. Use your head. Show your ex that you are the person that they fell in love with or are becoming the person that they want.
Take it slow. Take this time to learn about yourself and what you really want in a relationship. Visualize your ideal relationship. Make a list of what do you really want in a relationship, what you absolutely do not want in a relationship and what you really must have in a relationship. Don't think about your ex during this exercise, think about your ideal relationship. Once you've completed your lists, then determine if your ex fulfills your needs, wants and desires from a relationship. Also, take a hard look at yourself. Are you the type of person today that could attract the type of relationship that you want? If not, what do you have to do to become that person? Are you willing to become that person?
Relationships are perhaps the most important element of our lives and yet the least mastered. We expect for love to just happen to up and that we live happily ever after. It doesn't work that way. Love takes commitment, respect, honesty, vulnerability, humility and a heaping dose of courage. You and your partner must learn to nurture your love and create the relationship that you each want every day. To do this you must get real with yourself and get control of yourself. You cannot control your ex, but you can control how to get your ex back.
Article Source: Articlelogy.com
- Credit Cards A big selection of Cards in all flavors: Bad Credit Cards, Secured Cards, Prepaid Cards, Credit Cards for Canada, Low Interest Cards, etc -
Word Count: 931
Reduce Your Debts Without Bankruptcy. See How Much You Can Save. Free Debt Analysis
